Thursday, October 14, 2010

Liverpool sale heads to Sulawesi district court

Tom Hicks, feeling his grasp on Liverpool slipping further, has decided to pursue his ownership through the district court of Sulawesi in Indonesia.

Our legal representative in Indonesia, Kani Bal, insists that this is likely to be Hicks' final chance at appeal.  Sulawesi is one of the few islands in Indonesia where trial-by-combat is still widely practiced and accepted.

"I'm not overly concerned to be honest, " Mr. Broughton announced, descending from the skies using a parachute, entering through our office's open window.  "They train you how to survive in the Sulawesi pit-of-death as part of standard training.  It's all part of being in her Majesties royal bank of Scotland's service."

Mr. Broughton didn't remain with us long enough to elaborate.  Other duties beckoned the agent of RBS and he leapt out of the 7th floor window to land on a moving motorbike below.

Hicks' empire is just a spectre of what it once was.  These days he spends most of his time in board rooms stroking his small white cat, George, reminising on days of evil.

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